Question: History of Sati?

We here at Orion Oracle would like to welcome Prince Ea and Molinara to the first post of our Q&A session on Shiva and Parvati.
Prince Ea & Molinara have agreed to begin our sessions with a hard-hitting Querent question.
“Why did you kill yourself as Sati? Seems like you chose a pretty stupid reason to commit suicide, IMHO.” ~Querent.
**Molinara: “A good question and your opinion is valid.
I was a 17 year-old Aspergarian girl when I committed suicide. I had been rejected and humiliated by my father who had repeatedly reminded me that I was was flawed and would never find a husband.
Ninmah had known me since my infancy and arranged for me to wed Shiv to get me out of my father’s oppressive household. Shiv (who was like an uncle to me) agreed because he was fond of me and wanted to protect me.”
**Ea: “Sati was an odd girl, but a good person. Very intelligent, but lacking in social skills as people with Asperger’s do. Ninmah and I felt for her. It was difficult to watch how Dokashka treated her. There were several instances where I cried for her after witnessing how he verbally insulted her in public and she would just stare at the floor.
When Ninmah could no longer stomach the abuse and Sati (Satyana was her name at birth) was of age, Ninmah arranged the marriage. It was done to get her in a safe home, not to take advantage of her in any sexual way. I had no intention of bedding her.
As she was then, I knew she would probably never find a suitable husband who would be kind to her. I loved her as a niece and wanted to protect her from the miserable future I knew awaited her. Anyone who loves someone with Asperger’s or Autism Spectrum Disorder knows the fear that their loved one will be unable to live in this world without protection and guidance. That is the fear we felt for her when we brought her into our family.
Allow me to clarify something. In our world, a man could once marry a girl or young woman to offer her the protection of his home and family, as if to make her his ward–to take responsibility to feed, educate and watch over her as if she were his child. If she found love, it was usually with one of his sons or nephews. Her husband could then transfer protection of her to his son or nephew-making him her new husband. It was a noble practice. Unfortunately, this practice has been ruined by predators who view it as a way to pray on innocent girls.
A grown man or woman should not be having sex with a child. Let me say again–NO PHYSICALLY-MATURE PERSON SHOULD SEEK SEXUAL SATISFACTION FROM AN EMOTIONALLY AND PHYSICALLY IMMATURE PERSON. If they have those desires, it indicates a psychological condition that needs to be addressed by a trained professional. In the future, behavior like this will be a swift death-sentence for a child predator, as it will not be easily-hidden by wealth or made acceptable by societal conditioning or religion. Citizens of the future will not tolerate these people and will dispatch them accordingly. (We will be addressing this more in the future, as well as addressing Sex Trafficking.These are both subjects Lina has experienced and studied extensively.)
**Molinara: “I am in complete agreement with my Ea’s words on this.
At that time as Sati, I could not understand why my father’s family disliked me so much. I would try to figure out in my mind what was wrong with me, to understand why I couldn’t seem to get it right.
Shiv would teach me things I was interested in and I could ruminate on these subjects for days. I would perseverate on them–talking about them with anyone who had ears. These subjects fascinated me, but when Shiv was away I was not allowed to discuss them around my family. I was ordered keep quiet. My voice was of no value. The things that I was interested in were trivial. It damages the core of a person when they are told by the people who should love them most that they are flawed and of no value.
I had suicidal ideations long before I married Shiv. I just never told anyone.
I was told by Ninmah and Shiv that I was no longer allowed to be in the presence of people who mistreated me, that I deserved better. I didn’t hear their words.
All I focused on was the rejection.
During an annual festival my family held, my anger over their rejection came to a head when I was not invited or even acknowledged. Ninmah was invited to attend, but no thought was given to inviting me. I felt like they were relieved to be rid of me and I was consumed with the anger of rejection. Against Ninmah and Shiv’s orders, I snuck into the festival and in the middle of the festivities, I walked into a fire pit.
I looked at my father with my heart filled with hate. I was there to punish him for the years of humiliation and rejection. I was determined to humiliate him in front of everyone, like he had done to me so many times before.
Then I looked at Ninmah and saw the horror in her face. I remember regretting my decision in that moment, but by then it was too late. My clothes caught fire and I was overcome by smoke. At that time, there was no such thing as a suicide note. They had no idea why I did what I did.
Four lifetimes later and I still struggle with this event. I am working through some of the residual karma–especially with Ninmah. Ea and I have worked through a lot of this in therapy already.
Suicide is an extremely sensitive subject for me, because I’m on the other side of a successful attempt now and dealing with the pain I’ve caused those I love. The pain I’ve caused them is the worst part of my experience, I think. On this side, I realize I didn’t hurt the people I wanted to. I hurt worst those I loved the most.
I’ve learned from my suicide that you don’t get to decide the karmic outcome and you don’t get to decide who you hurt and who you don’t. You don’t get to decide who will be least and most effected by it. The person I wanted to be worst affected by the outcome was not and the person I didn’t want to be affected by it–Ninmah–was affected the worst. That’s just how it is with acts like this. And you still have to even the scales in the end with those you hurt.
That’s what hurts me the worst now. It wasn’t a final resolution…it just prolonged the problem. I have had to learn, make amends and try to get it right. And I still haven’t done that yet after all this time!
Then I think of all the brides who have committed Sati immolation because of my influence…I feel worse. My family tells me that those aren’t my fault–the women who committed those acts did so of their own accord from grief. Still, I feel the weight on my heart.
That is the answer to the querent’s question on the story of my suicide in my life as Satyana. It’s a painful, draining subject, so I’ll conclude the answer.”
**Prince Ea: “If BalMuhr is followed, Lina and I agree this story can be shared on Orion Oracle.”
“Thank you, Ea and Lina.”
“You’re welcome.”
(BalMuhr followed. Quoted as spoken from Sources. Not one word altered or changed.
Image of Sati: Public Domain)Sati

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s